Gail Godwin is the bestselling author of numerous novels, including Unfinished Desires, Flora, Grief Cottage, and Old Lovegood Girls, and two story collections. A lifelong diarist, she has published the first two volumes of her journals, excerpts from which were published in Narrative. Godwin is also the author of Getting to Know Death: A Meditation (Bloomsbury, 2024) and Heart: A Natural History of the Heart-Filled Life. She lives in Woodstock, New York.

Photograph by Jolanta Drozd Kaminski.

The Desperate Place

A Memoir

by Gail Godwin

Selected for the Pushcart Prize series, 2023


[de- + sperare; de = reverse the action of + sperare = to hope]


I can’t see a way out of this.
Things will not necessarily get better.
This is my life, but I may not get to do what I want in it.


This is the language that speaks to you in the desperate place.

A place from which you lack the means or power to escape.

A place in which you realize that someone you love does not, and will not ever, love you back.

A place in which you acknowledge your steep falling off in health, or strength, or status. A place in which you must accept that you are losing ground, losing face.

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