Jump to navigation
Well, written, really. That second paragraph draws you right in. The suspense builds nicely (WHEN are they coming back?). The next door neighbor . . . involved somehow?
But . . . some further tiny twist, maybe, or an inkling of what's to come?
An intriguing, heart-wrenching story. Loved it.
Strangely satisfying, like a small star slowly moving through a mass of black. Thank you.
I love the way the story moves from precision to vagueness; the empty house, the dog dying. The idea is rich and the language allows me to imagine everything between the words.
Brilliant last line. Thanks for the inspiration I was looking for! Now, if only I could craft something like that.
It makes you wonder what the man saw in the faces of his family when they walked through the door. That's why it's a good story. I'm left to wonder.
"No one is dead," Marie wrote. The dog wasn't dead either when he arrived at the home. It was in a pitiable state and one would think his wife and children might be as well--not dead, but not far from being.
Amazingly clean prose, suspended somewhere between Kafka and Sleeping Beauty.
It ended far too soon. Interesting characters. I want more!
I really enjoyed this story. You did a wonderful job creating a tense, unsettling atmosphere, and I thought the conclusion was effective. I am very frightened for him. What are these gray shapeless people going to do to him? Your description of his family is a very eery, nuanced way to convey his psychology, his fear and alienation. The last line was wonderful--his anxiety over explaining the dog's death a stand-in for his anxiety over explaining his own absence. Thanks!