I'll rid the world of bad things. But first, I need to get more coffee.
“Maybe you should leave the rumba to those who know how to do it.”
Advance planning was never Hank’s strong suit, he had to leave her.
You can go from one town square to another and never fall in love.
We need the opportunity to dance with really exquisite strangers.
The girl marched directly up to me, glaring, and said, “You hit my dog.”
Why kill something so mild-mannered, entertaining, and sociable?
Getting answers is easy. The difficult thing is knowing the right questions.
You can get anyone to sleep with you—if you want it bad enough.
My advice can be succinctly expressed in three words: Persist, persist, persist!
My advice is to take advice with a grain of salt.
I am always hungry & wanting to have sex. This is a fact.
If they don’t give you a seat at the table, bring a folding chair.
When I grow up I want to be one of the horses of the Apocalypse.
This book club has rules, Carolyn. Everyone HAS to read the book!
The financial plan works if we eat 40% of the kids before college.
And up ahead you'll see some jagged rocks that will kill us.
Don’t worry. I’ve performed this procedure hundreds of times.
“Stop looking at women’s magazines and call me in the morning.”
He’s become insufferable since that MacArthur fellowship.
“I wish my father was alive to see how lazy I could really be.”
New cartoon from Mick Stevens: “It’s hardly worth the trouble tonight.”
“No, actually you are very different from the women I usually date.”
See no evil, hear no evil, speak
no evil, eat a banana.
New cartoons by Le Lievre, Warp, Piccolo, Leavitt, and Sipress.